Who Is “i”?

Dissociative experiences are those that cause a person to detach from themselves to some extent. Sometimes memories are blocked. Sometimes personalities are separated within the same person. Sometimes a person is totally unable to recognize themselves and others as the people that they are. When high stress situations exist or when painful experiences cannot be dealt with, dissociation is a natural method of self-preservation. The same effect can also be achieved through drug use and sometimes even through meditation. The disorders are considered to be of a psychiatric nature when substance abuse, head trauma and medical conditions are not the cause for the abnormality. There are three typically recognized forms of Dissociative Disorders that can cause someone to be unsure of the identity of “I”. They are, Dissociative Amnesia, Dissociative Identity Disorder and Depersonalization Disorder.

Dissociative Amnesia
Pain is an unavoidable part of the overall human experience. Sometimes pain can be unbearable though. When person cannot deal with some painful or horrifying experience, they may block the memory of the event or situation. The blocked memory ceases to exist to that person, but associated fears may still remain, seemingly unexplained. The violent death of a loved one or a near death experience for oneself may result in the onset of the amnesia. Sometimes the memories are recovered when evidences of the terrible events surface. Sometimes, because such large chunks of memory are blocked, a person may be told by other people what sort of happenings went on during that time in her life.

Dissociative Identity Disorder
This disorder used to be called Multiple Personality Disorder. It is demonstrated by the demonstration of two or more distinct personalities manifested in a single individual. The cause for the split is usually painful memories of horrible experiences, often from childhood. Each personality has its own memories and there are, as a result, several gaps in the memory of the person. Much of the painful experience is left out of the mix. Psychiatrists believe that this disorder is over-diagnosed because of its fascinating traits. Psychiatrists’ goal for starting the healing process is to allow each personality, or alter, to express itself and recognize and speak to the other alters. The painful memories are then discussed and emotions are vented. The psychiatrist attempts to teach new coping methods.

Depersonalization Disorder
Depersonalization can be described much as the word sounds. A person gets the feeling that he is not a person. He feels as though he just watches himself go through life without really every feeling anything. Most feelings are muted and unreal. Sometimes the person also feels as though the world and the people around him cease to be real. The person who has these feelings is not necessarily psychologically ill because he is all the time aware of the feelings as being feelings instead of reality. Most people’s experiences are caused by panic attacks or are very short term in nature. Therapy can be helpful if the experiences are particularly bothersome.

Coming to a secure realization of personal identity, even after severely traumatic events, can be difficult. It is possible, however. Sometimes the disorders described above will right themselves in a short time. Other times, therapy can be immensely helpful in returning oneself to a coherent self.

Frances, Allen MD and First, Michael B. MD. Your Mental Health: A Layman’s Guide to
the Psychiatrist’s Bible. New York: Scribner, 1998.

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